I know for sure that when people tell me their dreams I think that they are REALLY BORING. But I had the weirdest dream, and I have to tell people about it! Anyway, I'm warning you in advance that this might be intensely boring. My dream starts with me, laying in bed, watching TV, waiting for Darryl to come home. And then I hear this noise, and I call downstairs to see if it was him. But it wasn't! A complete stranger comes into the room, talking on my phone, and so as to not interrupt his conversation, he mouths the words, "Sorry, it was open." I assume he means the front door, but I wasn't waiting to find out. He walks towards the bed to sit and watch TV while on the phone, and I call Yoder. Then, I start to run away; but I'm afraid he'll follow, so I steal his glasses so he can't see to follow me! I run downstairs, and decide to run to my neighbor's house, 2 doors away to call the police. I notice the bad guy must be driving this blue truck parked on the street, because it's not familiar to me. But another one of my neighbors is having a party, so I can't be absolutely sure that it's his. My neighbor's daughter answers the door, and points me to their phone, which was an old rotary phone. I couldn't get a dial tone because people kept calling them. So I kept hanging up on everyone calling, but I had to be stealthy about that, because I didn't want my neighbors to know how rude I was being. I get through to 911, and the man just keeps chatting to me, and I was so angry that he wouldn't hurry up and get the police over. Just then, the county sheriff shows up at the door, with one deputy. The 911 guy was just talking to me waiting for help to arrive, like OnStar does. Weird. So we walk towards my house, and the blue truck is gone. The only weird car around is a blue Taurus. So I tell the police that he might be gone already. They tell me to go first and unlock the door. (SO BRAVE.) There's a note on the door and they take it and read it. They tell me that the bad guy left a thank you note and some money for my trouble. The police agree to come inside and look around, and I hear the sheriff say to the deputy, who he must have been training, "Now, don't forget to make a big deal about how we're checking everywhere and that we're POSITIVE he's gone." I decide that they are idiots, and only trying to appease me. I walk in the house and turn on some lights, and there he is! Standing on my stairs, surrounded by suitcases. I scream like crazy and the police come in. When the bad guy sees the police, he uses this humongous remote control to cut power to the house. (Good thing he had time to rewire my house!) But the police charge the stairs and catch him. They sit the bad guy on the couch in my living room, and they go outside to file reports or radio stuff, or whatever they do. The bad guy is accompanied by his female defense attorney, who got there mighty fast, I might add. I wait upstairs, because I am so upset I am shaking. Then, the bad guy starts balling up pieces of paper, and setting them on fire. He throws them around the room, and as he does so, he calls upstairs to tell me what he's doing. I don't believe that anyone would give this crazy man a lighter, but I peek downstairs anyway to check it out. And there are burning paper balls everywhere! I run upstairs and grab a huge soda cup like they sell at amusement parks and fill it with water. I rush downstairs. I see that the paper balls are going out on their own, and are just leaving singe marks on the floor. I can't put out all of them with my cup of water, so I pour it on the bad guy. I am briefly upset that my couch is wet, but the bad guy is soaking, and he won't have any clothes to change into and that makes me happy! The police return to take the bad guy away, and laugh at his soggy state. I complain about the floors being ruined, and they said not to worry, the bad guy will have to pay for the damage. I'm still upset though, because I know that Darryl won't want to have the floors refinished until after our dog dies and can't scratch them up. So I'll have to live with these singe marks for a long time. The sheriff pops his head back in the door one more time to give me the envelope they found attached to the door. They made photocopies of the note for evidence, but gave me the money. On the back of the envelope is a list of his incurred expenses, which is quite a large number. But he subtracts the cost of his stolen glasses, and only leaves me a total of 72 cents! The End. :)